You
must have personal respect and consideration for yourself.
Everyone
deserves respect and love, but you can't expect to get it
unless you give it.
If
you allow your partner to disparage you, expect to hear other
damaging words.
Whatever
you are willing to accept is exactly what you're going to
get.
Be
compassionate, understanding, forgiving and merciful.
Patience,
kindness, consideration and thoughtfulness can never be in short
demand.
Never
let a person use names or words to hurt or degrade you or your
partner.
Vow
to protect yourself from thoughtless, rude, mean or punishing
behavior.
If
destructive words are being used, for whatever the reason, it
must Stop. If not, a relationship can't survive.
Once
you've reacted you can then be proactive.
A
controlled mouth shows a controlled mind. Use words for empowerment,
encouragement and positive recognition.
Ask
for respect. Quietly demand it. If your lover, partner, parent
or friend can't exhibit self control over their mouth, seriously
consider looking elsewhere for a relationship.
Pick
an appropriate the time to discuss important issues. This is
particularly true if there is an emotional charge where feelings
of anger or vexation need to be vented.
Never
enter into discussion of personal, private or intimate issues
in public. Wait until you have privacy and the time to tackle
issues.
If
a person makes a mistake, or does something that disappoints
or angers you, belittlement or badmouthing them in front of
others will only lead to further resentment, anger and frustration.
Trying
to discuss things in bed just before sleep, or while getting
ready for bed is simply thoughtless, inconsiderate and a remedy
for disaster.
Trying
to discuss anything when the other person won't cooperate or
take the time to talk is a waste of time.
If
necessary make a date to talk.
If
the person keeps on delaying or avoiding conversation or discussion
on issues that are important or significant to you, you may
need to put it in writing and place it in their hands.
Talking
is good for closure of some issues. And, unless allowed, will
create a wound that won't close.
You
can never truly waste your thoughts and words on the separated
or departed. Life and thought continues.
Romance
doesn't just exist, you must make it happen. You must make a
sincere effort to keep it alive to help your relationship flourish.
Little things count, it doesn't have to be a dozen roses and
champagne all the time. A favorite piece of candy in a pocket
or a little note can mean a lot.
Commit
yourself to do something romantic every day. Show it. Demonstrate
it. It's the accumulative total of all the little things that
in end adds up to a super special love and romance.